Thursday, October 28, 2010

the problem with being a woman

I wasn't sure I was going to write a post tonight - I wasn't feeling anything in particular and had no real inclination to dig around in my mind too much to find a subject. But, after reading some of the recent blog posts of the writers I follow, I now feel compelled to write something about the impression I am left with.

Being in Australia, or maybe just because I'm generally out of the loop - I missed a major uproar centred around a blog/article posted online on US Marie Claire. The title "Should 'Fatties' Get A Room?" pretty well sets up the readers expectations of its contents. So, this misinformed, idiot of a woman goes on to write about how offensive it is for her to see 'obese' people in public displays of affection, or just in public - you know, walking around.

So, suppressing my immediate urge to spit acidic words of hate and disgust at this woman, mostly I'm just left wondering who lets people like this, write like this, and better yet who in their right mind publishes it for crying out loud?! Talk about a pile of verbal diarrhoea.

So, there's camp 'what an horrible, insensitive bitch'; there's also a 'what the fuck Marie Claire?' crew; along with 'lets give her a hug, she knows not what she does' bunch. I think I fall somewhere in between - except for me, it's more like 'Marie Claire pay this stupid woman for utter crap, and all I wanna do is kick her really fucking hard in the shins!' I guess that'd be camp StrangeBird!

I don't want to dwell on this subject, because lets face it - what I feel like saying has been said all before and executed with much more eloquence than I can muster. But what it does bring to the forefront of my consciousness, is just how crap it can be, being a woman.

Obviously, I can't speak for all women. But the general experience I have tells me that a content woman is a rare woman. We carry on in this world, our whole lives, with everyone and everything telling us we aren't good enough, that we need to change. Advertising, magazines, the general external world presents a picture of what we 'should' be; how we 'should' act; what we 'should' wear - the cut of your skirt, the shape of your eyebrows, the size of your handbag, the career, the makeup, the hairstyle, what you should drink-eat-do-be-have-want - everything. ENOUGH! I have to wonder, if I were orphaned as a baby and raised by wolves in the wild, away from mirrors and people and 'things', would I be content? Would I be happier with myself than I currently am? I suspect I'd have some major fucking problems, but I also suspect that my self esteem and self worth would be well intact.

I don't know, what's the solution? Stop listening? Stop reading? Stop caring? Stop taking myself so seriously? All these things are easier said than done. Find someone to love me who doesn't care if I pluck my eyebrows? Hmmm... near impossibility?

All I know is that today we had a group morning tea at work, with every delicious sweet thing you could possibly imagine and hope to see before you. And at this morning tea - there were girls, visibly torn about eating anything. Scraping the icing off the cake, consuming minute portions or even not having anything at all. These beautiful, lovely girls tormented about eating things that might make them gain weight. What a crock! Yep, I'm all for healthy and if you wanna eat salad forever because you like it - then that's ok with me.. but if you torture yourself, deny yourself for what, an ideal, an expectation - what's the point? I suppose, this attitude could account for why I am overweight and a terrible emotional eater - but just in that moment, I was happy. Happy to be a woman saying yes to a slice of cake.

The problem with being a woman is that it's just so damn complicated, and nothing ever seems good enough.

Stupidity is offensive, not obesity.

Be happy.

SB xx

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