Have you any dreams you'd like to sell?

While on my flight the other day, I happened upon the Fleetwood Mac song 'Dreams'.  Every time I hear it, I gather a little more meaning from it. Today, it is my soundtrack.

Now here you go again
You say you want your freedom
Well who am I to keep you down?
It's only right that you should
Play the way you feel it
But listen carefully to the sound
Of your loneliness
Like a heartbeat .. drives you mad
In the stillness of remembering what you had
And what you lost ...
And what you had ...
You know what you lost

Oh thunder only happens when it's raining
Players only love you when they're playing
They say women they will come and they will go
When the rain washes you clean you'll know
You'll know

Now here I go again I see the crystal vision
I keep my visions to myself
It's only me who wants to
Wrap around your dreams and ...
Have you any dreams you'd like to sell?
Dreams of loneliness
Like a heartbeat .. drives you mad
In the stillness of remembering what you had
And what you lost ...
Who says what you had ...
Ooh and what you lost

Thunder only happens when it's raining
Players only love you when they're playing
They say women they will come and they will go
When the rain washes you clean you'll know

Oh thunder only happens when it's raining
Players only love you when they're playing
They say women they will come and they will go
When the rain washes you clean you'll know
You'll know ...
You'll know ...
You will know
Ooo you'll know

I have returned from my break, and what did I learn? Only that you can't leave your problems behind for long.  Silly me; I thought maybe I could run away, pack my thoughts and feelings into a suitcase, only to scatter them over the sea and away from me.  It just doesn't work that way...

I was hoping to come back an improved version of myself - but all the little things have already caught up with me - and they bring me back down.  I figure I'm going to have to put on that mask again, the one that tells people I am 'together', I am logical and focused; I am ok.  All the while underneath, I feel like I am eroding like a sand dune - so slowly that it goes unnoticed, until one day someone happens to see that my pile of sand has shifted completely.

SB xx