I am significantly without inspiration at present. I must say that I'm not finding much joy in things - well, at work really. The atmosphere of the place is so shitty and disjointed. I know I have a warped sense of 'the way things should be'. Sadly it isn't enough that I think things should be a certain way, that people should be a certain way.
I'm finding myself feeling stuck again, bored. The boredom gives me more time to focus on the crappy stuff.
Why is it, that when you look in the mirror without any expectations or hopes - that the reflection is at its most beautiful?
I was at a local pub tonight - having drinks and dinner with some people from work, and I had small opportunities to 'people watch'. You get a bit of a sense when you walk into these places, when you stand at the bar, that you're at a meat market. Everyone is trying to find something, someone. A good looking guy walks in, he instantly eyes the crowd of young attractive women, and he keeps watching, almost willing one of them to look up, to make eye contact, to make his night? Life would be a whole lot easier, if we were animals without freewill and emotion. If we didn't become attached to people, it would all just be all about purpose, procreating.
Oh, I'm a lot tired, a little miserable and a bit over chasing 'rainbows'.
SB xx
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